Writer's & reader's civilised & serious conversation conference
- Thread starter Horsa
- Start date
During the 1930's in Mongolia they had an atheist period where Buddhist monks (before then Mongolia was a Buddhist country) were forced to either stop preaching or they'd get killed. I think that's absolutely disgusting.
I've always been brought up to think that communism is bad but it did a lot of good in Mongolia after the war as the people were given more choices & higher wages & the economy really improved big-time.
I went to the optician for an eye test yesterday & found out that the reason why I've been getting twitching, itching, stinging & burning eyes, dropping to sleep reading although I'd got enough sleep & why I wasn't always reading properly causing me to read things differently at different times because sometimes I read print that I didn't see when I looked at it earlier was because my glasses were way too strong for me & drew the moisture out of my eyes so they've been left dry. (I was over-due an eye-test as my last optician should have recalled me in February but didn't so I changed optician.) Now, I've been told that I've got to put eye drops in my eyes every 2 hours until I run out of them to put moisture back in them & that I haven't got to do too much that's heavily reliant on sight until I get my new spectacles in 2 weeks time & that I need an eye test every year rather than 2 as my Grandma had glaucoma & my Mother has it too. My hobbies are reading, typing & singing so the only hobby I'm left with at the moment is singing. I've got to carry on doing what I need to do but other than baking, painting, walking & singing I'm stuck for things to do that don't rely on sight so much. I get bored really easily & I'm going to miss my books. Dad told me to listen to music but all the music systems are in the same room he has the T.V. in & he's always got the T.V. on so singing & listening to music are out of the question. My parents told me to watch T.V. but Father hogs the remote & I don't like most of what he watches. Has anyone else got any ideas of other things I could do which don't rely so heavily on sight please? *I've picked some nice, sophisticated-looking pink wire frames.*
I'll be o.k. when I've finished my course of eye drops & collected my new spectacles. It's a pain having to have eye drops in every 2 hours. I'm not going to stop reading & typing for good until I'm sorted because I'd be very bored if I didn't read. I'm just going to try to cut down a bit & try to do other things that aren't as strenuous on the eyes more. It's hard because I'm in the habit of reaching for a book when I'm bored & I'm missing reading or typing every time I get bored. Thank you very much, Moxie. :0)
I'm making a hat.
I'm thinking positive about my situation now. The fact that my spectacles were too strong means that my eyes have improved a lot. If that keeps happening there may come a time when I only need them for reading, writing & typing or not at all which will mean I can go swimming again & I used to love going swimming as I found it very relaxing & it might help me lose some weight.
I'm thinking positive about my situation now. The fact that my spectacles were too strong means that my eyes have improved a lot. If that keeps happening there may come a time when I only need them for reading, writing & typing or not at all which will mean I can go swimming again & I used to love going swimming as I found it very relaxing & it might help me lose some weight.
I've just run out of eye drops. Yippee! I go for my new spectacles tomorrow. I'm very sorry for being a pain but I've had a harsh life & use books as my refuge & try to keep myself occupied at all times (to the point of working myself to the point of exhaustion sometimes & I give myself headaches because of it sometimes) to distract myself so I don't get upset. I need books like I need to express my emotions poetically. I've said I'm bored more often than an inquisitive 6 year old on a school holiday. I was also scared because when my bad eye was being tested everything went blurred. I've been trying my best to keep myself busy while still resting my eyes. I've been listening to music & singing along but I sung that much I sung myself hoarse though I'd prefer it if I said something which sounds the same but means something different which is I sung that much I sung myself horse. Lol. I've also been making hats, knitting scarves & drawing as well as watching more T.V. which was good when we were watching fascinating programmes or comedies until my parents were speaking about the T.V. programme & every time I joined in or had anything to say I got shouted at. It's as though I'm not allowed to have a mind of my own or say what I think & everyone else is & I'm always wrong even when I know I'm right. I've felt really depressed & useless. I've felt like an empty-headed numbskull who can't even read properly & just intellectually dead/ I know I may come across as someone who feels sorry for herself when she appears to have everything anyone could wish for but that's not the case & no one should judge unless they either know what I've been through or have been through the same thing. I know I talk about taboo subjects sometimes but I think that some subjects society sees as taboo should be spoken about more often so that society doesn't just judge people without knowing the circumstances & just label people which is unfair & I know I'd always be there for anyone who has been through the same thing or something similar to me. I know everyone has their own problems to solve & has to solve them which they do, me included but I'll always be there for anyone providing they're not nasty to me & haven't done anything drastically wrong. I know I'm very communicative but that doesn't mean that I can't listen, understand & sympathise & help & support too because I can & do. I don't just think about myself like some people think. I'm donating the hats & scarves to charity.
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I've got my new specs & I can see things a lot clearer than I have been able to for ages & they suit me that much they blend into my face. You've got to get close-up to actually tell I've got them on.
Happy Bonfire Night!
Stay safe. Remember firework safety if you're letting them off.
On 5 November 1605, Robert Catesby, Guy Fawkes & 11 other people were caught in the act of trying to blow up the houses of Parliament with the King in it.
Since then people have had bonfires on the night of 5th November & we let off fireworks, make guys, go round asking for a penny for the guy which goes on the bonfire, we have jacket potatoes with cheese, pie & peas, bonfire toffee, toffee apples & parkin. Some people have bangers & mash too.
There was a rhyme we all learnt when I was at school. "Remember, Remember the 5th of November, gunpowder, treason & plot."
Stay safe. Remember firework safety if you're letting them off.
On 5 November 1605, Robert Catesby, Guy Fawkes & 11 other people were caught in the act of trying to blow up the houses of Parliament with the King in it.
Since then people have had bonfires on the night of 5th November & we let off fireworks, make guys, go round asking for a penny for the guy which goes on the bonfire, we have jacket potatoes with cheese, pie & peas, bonfire toffee, toffee apples & parkin. Some people have bangers & mash too.
There was a rhyme we all learnt when I was at school. "Remember, Remember the 5th of November, gunpowder, treason & plot."
Giving my eyes a break caused a lot of hassle for me as I've had a very harsh past & used reading as a refuge. Not being able to read as often caused me to have a few tearful episodes which I'm waiting for help for. I'm on the waiting list for 1 to 1 self-esteem boosting which is what the assessment pointed out to be the most suitable treatment for me. All else I got told was to take more physical exercise & cut down on stimulants.
I'm trying to think of a physical activity that I will enjoy. I can't swim as I need spectacles all the time. I was born with slight bronchitis which affects me when I run so I can't do anything that involves running. I can't do headstands or balance so yoga is out of the question.
I'm very sorry if I've been a nuisance recently. I'm going to take a bit of a break & only write poetry until I'm sorted out.
I'm trying to think of a physical activity that I will enjoy. I can't swim as I need spectacles all the time. I was born with slight bronchitis which affects me when I run so I can't do anything that involves running. I can't do headstands or balance so yoga is out of the question.
I'm very sorry if I've been a nuisance recently. I'm going to take a bit of a break & only write poetry until I'm sorted out.
Giving my eyes a break caused a lot of hassle for me as I've had a very harsh past & used reading as a refuge for so long so when I couldn't read as often a lot of harsh memories came back to me & made me cry. Not being able to read as often caused me to have a few tearful episodes which I'm waiting for help for. It was bad enough having the sensitivity of a 5 year old to start with. I felt immature because of it but understood why I was like I was. I'm not going to pull myself down because of it. Depression is common in people who've been through what I've been through & it can be over-come with help. I need to be able to relax though. No one can keep themselves occupied all the time without burning themselves out at some point. I'm on the waiting list for 1 to 1 self-esteem boosting which is what the assessment pointed out to be the most suitable treatment for me. All else I got told was to take more physical exercise & cut down on stimulants.
I'm trying to think of a physical activity that I will enjoy. I can't swim as I need spectacles all the time. I was born with slight bronchitis which affects me when I run so I can't do anything that involves running. I can't do headstands or balance so yoga is out of the question.
I'm very sorry if I've been a nuisance recently taking things personally all the time & getting over-communicative. I'm going to take a bit of a break & only write poetry until I'm sorted out. I've tried my best to carry on as normal & pretend there's nothing wrong but it isn't working. People notice the change in me & the fact it's not a good change.
I'm trying to think of a physical activity that I will enjoy. I can't swim as I need spectacles all the time. I was born with slight bronchitis which affects me when I run so I can't do anything that involves running. I can't do headstands or balance so yoga is out of the question.
I'm very sorry if I've been a nuisance recently taking things personally all the time & getting over-communicative. I'm going to take a bit of a break & only write poetry until I'm sorted out. I've tried my best to carry on as normal & pretend there's nothing wrong but it isn't working. People notice the change in me & the fact it's not a good change.
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It's awful when you just start to cry.
It just comes on & you've got to work out why.
You just can't stop yourself but it's because you've been strong too long.
You've just got to let it out though the time & place is wrong.
Some people think you're just an attention-seeker & you just want tea & sympathy but you don't.
Others think you'll just be able to snap out of it but you won't.
You've taken your refuge in a book for so long that when you don't read you can't cope.
You really miss your books as they hide the harsh truths from you & you sit & mope.
You've had a harsh life.
You only ever have trouble & strife.
You're sick of seeking solutions to problems & finding ways out of situations for which there are no ways out.
You just feel as if you want to scream & shout.
You think of everything that you could have done.
You just can't seem to have any more fun.
You would really love to have a laugh & joke & dance & sing.
You just can't. For some people a bell will ring.
At some point in your life, something joy will have to bring.
You end up having the sensitivity of a 5 year old.
You don't want to understand anything anymore that you read or you're told.
You're ashamed that the least thing said reminding you of certain memories triggers your tears.
Depression isn't just an excuse used by cry-babies, it's a condition that should be 1 of your worst fears.
It's like a black cloud hanging over your head.
Some people think they'd be better off dead.
You feel like a failure & you've let everyone down.
You wear a smile less often than a frown.
Some people think depressed people are stupid, weak-minded people but that's not always the case.
No one should judge others for how they feel as they don't know what the other person has had to face.
You think that everyone hates you.
You don't think you can do anything right no matter what you do.
You're not proud of who you are.
You think that you'll never go far.
You have absolutely no pride.
You just can't count the amount of tears you've cried.
You hate who you are but you can change that.
You have the power to change who you are to a certain extent to go to where you want to be from where you're at.
You see no way out of the position you're in.
To get back on track you don't know where to begin.
That is unless you get help or have been in that position before.
If you've been in that position before you know what's in store.
You go through your old written work, some of it doesn't work, some does work.
You work hard to get over it & don't shirk.
It just comes on & you've got to work out why.
You just can't stop yourself but it's because you've been strong too long.
You've just got to let it out though the time & place is wrong.
Some people think you're just an attention-seeker & you just want tea & sympathy but you don't.
Others think you'll just be able to snap out of it but you won't.
You've taken your refuge in a book for so long that when you don't read you can't cope.
You really miss your books as they hide the harsh truths from you & you sit & mope.
You've had a harsh life.
You only ever have trouble & strife.
You're sick of seeking solutions to problems & finding ways out of situations for which there are no ways out.
You just feel as if you want to scream & shout.
You think of everything that you could have done.
You just can't seem to have any more fun.
You would really love to have a laugh & joke & dance & sing.
You just can't. For some people a bell will ring.
At some point in your life, something joy will have to bring.
You end up having the sensitivity of a 5 year old.
You don't want to understand anything anymore that you read or you're told.
You're ashamed that the least thing said reminding you of certain memories triggers your tears.
Depression isn't just an excuse used by cry-babies, it's a condition that should be 1 of your worst fears.
It's like a black cloud hanging over your head.
Some people think they'd be better off dead.
You feel like a failure & you've let everyone down.
You wear a smile less often than a frown.
Some people think depressed people are stupid, weak-minded people but that's not always the case.
No one should judge others for how they feel as they don't know what the other person has had to face.
You think that everyone hates you.
You don't think you can do anything right no matter what you do.
You're not proud of who you are.
You think that you'll never go far.
You have absolutely no pride.
You just can't count the amount of tears you've cried.
You hate who you are but you can change that.
You have the power to change who you are to a certain extent to go to where you want to be from where you're at.
You see no way out of the position you're in.
To get back on track you don't know where to begin.
That is unless you get help or have been in that position before.
If you've been in that position before you know what's in store.
You go through your old written work, some of it doesn't work, some does work.
You work hard to get over it & don't shirk.
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Thank you very much for putting up with my whinging, whining & moaning everyone. I'm very sorry I was a pain. I got anxious & depressed & asked for help. A friend suggested mindfulness & hygge. I rediscovered meditation & have been feeling much better since. I had my 1st appointment with an emotional well-being practitioner today & got discharged before 1/2 of my appointment was over because I felt that much better as was shown in my PHQ9 & GAD7 scores which went from 17 & 13 respectively to 2 5s. I'm not even 1/2 as sensitive as I was & feel much happier. New Year, New me. Meditation is absolutely fantastic. I'd recommend it to anyone.
I went to a party last night. I really enjoyed myself but am hungover today. They got me up on the dancefloor though & wouldn't let me off all night even though I only knew the waltz & the twist. They insisted on teaching me to dance. (I was contemplating learning line dancing before Xmas.) I'm aching all over today. Where I'm not aching because of the hangover I'm aching because of dancing too much.